Friday, December 11, 2009

It’s The End Of The World As I Know It (And I Feel Fine)

It’s The End Of The World As I Know It (And I Feel Fine)
First, let me put you in the mood with this song that inspired this blog post. Does anyone else out there wish that life could be a little bit more easier?  I know I do.  I’m trying to be positive in my life.  I can’t manage it every day, but I try.  At least last night I got [...]

First, let me put you in the mood with this song that inspired this blog post.

Does anyone else out there wish that life could be a little bit more easier?  I know I do.  I’m trying to be positive in my life.  I can’t manage it every day, but I try.  At least last night I got home from a very nice charity event that I volunteered to work to help sick kids, which always puts my own problems into perspective.  I just keep telling myself hey, at least you lost some weight girl, be happy about that!
 
 
I’ve had the busiest month I’ve had in a long, long time.  I’ve been dealing with all sorts of problems and issues, such as spending over six hours writing letters and making phone calls to Mayo Clinic, my insurance company, a national patient advocate group, and my old employer  in the hopes that SOMEONE will correct the large bill Mayo sent to me in error.  Even though I have the proof my insurance paid for my tests, they won’t stop billing me and is has been going on since May.  I’m so tired of going back and forth with them, so please keep your fingers crossed for me. 
 
 
At least I also got something fun, a new king bedroom set.  I haven’t ever slept this good, and hubby and I couldn’t be happier.  I got the best deal in the world, and I should hope so, as I had been looking for a new king bed for over two years.  The only unhappy person is Beatrice, who is having a hard time jumping up on the bed due to her extra-large size and short legs.  Poor Bea.
 
Then, there was the three hours I spent contacting various individuals in government and media because we unemployed citizens of Michigan have to put resumes online at a certain website, and all of a sudden I am getting spammed like crazy for job adds, training, etc.  So, people are accessing my personal information that I’m forced to give out, and it pisses me off.  I haven’t heard back from anyone yet, but when I do I’ll let you know.  I really don’t want people doing this to me,  as I already get over fifty spam emails a day from this blog email account.  I get hundreds of emails a day and now all these extra spam emails have put me over the edge. 
 
 
I have been busy with shopping and can proudly say that I am officially done with my Christmas shopping and every present has been wrapped since Monday afternoon.  I have been doing most of my shopping online for years now, and I’ll never be one of those Black Friday lady shoppers who goes out to Kohl’s at 5 am.  The online deals rock, and my best deal was 65% off of my entire Arbonne order … I just had to order at 2 am to get her Black Friday deal.  I’m not usually a fancy face product person, heck, I still use Cover Girl powder, but because of my evil Rosacea I have to use the RE9 product line which is expensive, so 65% off was a miracle and I’m so appreciative of her doing that for her customers.
 
 
I’ve also been doing a lot of volunteer work and just this week I went shopping for toys for needy kids, worked the charity event last night, as well as stuffed about a thousand envelopes for ten hours at home within twenty-four hours.   Next Saturday I get to be the photographer (For free, but still, it is one step closer to my dream of having my own photography business) for a charity Christmas Party.  I also worked at the school library today, and the librarian let me decorate for Christmas, which is always fun. 
 
And, moving on to the crappy health stuff:
 
My right eye is getting smaller.  I’ve noticed it since Christmas of last year, but I just wrote it off to me being paranoid about one more heath thing.  I went to the eye doctor about five weeks ago because my floaters were getting worse, and all of a sudden I can’t see things from the right side, which causes me to get into near car accidents and near cart crashes at the grocery store.  My eye doctor noticed it, sent me to an eye surgeon, who thought it was probably due to Graves Disease.  My Endocrinologist redid all of my tests, and it isn’t Graves, which means it is either eye nerve damage due to my connective tissue disease and/or Dysautonomia, or it is a brain tumor.  I’m leaning towards the Dysautonomia related nerve damage.  Good times. 
 
 
On top of all of this new and weird little things are happening, such as a ton of hair fell out as well as a lot of my eyelashes.  The worse thing is that my toes, feet and hands are numb all of the time and they are freezing cold all of the time, too.  It is so painful and I have been wearing buddies on my hands and feet, warming them up in the microwave every hour.  I had been dreading to go back to doctors because it is so darn costly and draining.  Just look at these bald pictures.  My mom is honestly BALD, so when this started happening, I freaked out.  I’m almost 39, way too young to be wearing a darn weave.
 
 
I thought this was from stress, but now I am not so sure.
 
 
I went to four doctors in two weeks, all referred from the first doctor I saw.  I had failed my field of vision tests IN BOTH EYES last week, so now I have to go back to the eye doctor Wednesday and god knows what is going to happen.  I have no idea if I’m going to lose my license or what.  All I know is that since last March every few weeks or so I have periods that span for two or three weeks where I suddenly can’t read or write, everything gets very blurry, and I get bad headaches that my migraine medicine can’t cure. 
 
Notice the difference with and without makeup.  If I ever was on Survivor, mascara would be my one luxury item.
 
 
The worst of it is that my Endocrinologist TOLD me to go back to see a Neurologist, and she refered me to a new Neurologist because my old one’s secretary cried when she was asked to send my medical records to my Cardiologist.  Seriously.  I can’t deal with their drama, so I am done with that office.  So, I go to the new one.  This new idiot Neurologist read my records after dicking around with her drug rep for twenty minutes, and then comes into the exam room, asks me two questions, and tells me I have Bipolar Disorder within three minutes of walking in the door.  SERIOUSLY.  She thinks it is because I can’t sleep and have headaches.  I’d usually laugh something like this off but I was furious, and when I get mad, I cry.  I argued with her for another half hour, and she refused to listen, because she saw in my medical history that my mom has it.  She did admit by the end of my appointment that I may not have it because I wasn’t talking fast like a normal bipolar does.  She refused to prescribe me the only drug that ever helped me with nerve pain, Lyrica.  She didn’t give me a script for my new weird headaches and chalked them up to migraines, even though I told her my migraine medication hasn’t worked, and that I rarely have migraines anymore since I don’t have a uterus anymore (Even though, yes, I still have a period WITHOUT HAVING A UTERUS.  Did you know 20% of woman without one still can have periods?  I am pissed about this, too.)  She completely ignored my new nerve symptoms even though Mayo and another local doctor proved and provided proof that I already have Dsyautonomia, Polyneuropathy and Small Distal Neuropathy.  She only gave me a five minute mini neuro exam and didn’t even bother to look or touch my cold and numb feet, and simply sent me on my way w/Cymbalta.  Since her drug rep for it was just there and I had overheard their entire conversation, I can only assume she was more concerned about helping him out over helping me.  I am beyond pissed off and wonder how does my supposed “bipolar”give me numb feet and shrink my eye and cause me to lose my vision?  I am so pissed off, not only because this visit will cost me like $70, but because she was so overwhelmed by my medical chart that she chose to write me off as crazy rather than help me.  Never has anyone told me that I had this, and my mental health professional bff who has known me for eighteen years and lived with me told me in no way is she right or could she even possibly make that diagnosis so quickly.  WTF is wrong with this doctor? 
 
So, while I’m trying to feel fine and be positive and undergo more eye tests, I may be a little MIA in blog world again.  As soon as I can I’ll be visiting your blogs, and I hope you all are doing ok.
Posted in Arbonne, Autoimmune Diseases, Autonomic Neuropathy, Ehlers Danlos Syndrome, Graves Disease, Health, health blogs, Invisible Diseases, Life is not fair, Mayo Clinic, Neurologist, Neuropathy, Ophthalmopathy, pain, Polyneuropathy, Psychology, Rosacea, Rosasea, Thyroid, weight loss Tagged: baldness, Breaking news, end of the world, endocrinologist, entertainment, eye health, field of vision test, Health, life, Lyrica, Mental Health, news, personal

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